Mall Priest

Mall Priest

Read Time: 2 Minutes

Horror, humour, and all the hallmarks of an 80s cheesy horror flick rolled into a fantastically engaging story. Think over-the-top style violence and mayhem you’d get in horror movies of that era, and you’ll be on the right path. It’s Christmas Eve, 1985 and shoppers inside Mallzilla, the largest shopping mall in Springfield are about to have a very not-merry Christmas.

The story started off a little slow, with a lot of introductions of the important characters of the book, but everything took off quickly once Abaddon, a demon from Hell started cutting loose inside the shopping mall. After spending the last 500-ish year safely contained thanks to the intervention of the church, Abaddon has finally escaped and needs to build an army.

Standing in his way? Father Sam, a priest handing out fliers to the masses who just want to get their shopping done, mall cop Sarah Ridley who goes way back with Sam, Ricky Gibson, a failing rockstar who can only land gigs playing shopping malls, and a host of mall militia, a SWAT team, and an eight-year-old girl.

Locked inside the mall with the demon, they’re the only hope for humanity. The cops and priests outside can’t get in, and shoppers are dropping like flies as Abaddon carves his way through the throngs.

A massive body count accompanied by lots of needless violence and gore. Heads being karate-chopped off, Santa going nuts and killing his helpers, guts being ripped out of people, people getting eaten alive. Plus, the staple of any 80s horror movies; boobs. Completely over-the-top but entertaining as all get-out.

A strong cast of characters, from the heroes of Sam and Sarah, through bonkers mix of chaotic, crazy, funny, tragic and tough guy supporting roles with decently developed backgrounds. A good mix of humour with the horror, balancing out even some of the darker moments. Some seriously intense scenes, yet still managing to be light.

The narration by Justin Price was well done. Price voices a large cast of characters ranging from kids and softly spoken priests to burley Scotsmen and demonic voices, and the production was excellent as well. No background noises, obvious retakes or the like. A solid production all round.

Fun and thrilling, this nostalgic throwback to 80s horror had me hooked. With what looks to be a three-book series, this one had a satisfying ending. No massive cliff-hangers, just a little tease of what else might be in store. Not yet on audio at time of writing, but I’ll be keeping an eye out for the next audiobook.


Tagged

Humorous, Demons
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